Open War
Ladies and gentlemen, brace yourselves: the Soil Test results are in.
And it brings me great pleasure to announce that our pH levels are ideal. It brings me untold happiness to tell you that our Phosphorous levels are also outstanding. More, I am fairly carbonated with joy to tell you, one and all, that our Potash reading couldn’t be better.
But.
(please sit down) Our Nitrogen levels are
(someone hold me)
DEPLETED.
Now, I’m not going to try and slip this one by. Try as I might, tempting as it is, I can’t. I just can’t. And by that I mean I had no idea you could hook up tanks of Nitrogen to your garden and crank out 25-pound cucumbers, but I can’t wait to try this.
Kidding.
(sort of)
I have just returned from the yard and had the final say on the weeds and overgrowth that have mocked me three summers in a row. In the form of a weed killer and pesticide and a little something I like to call in Agent Orange.
Kidding.
(sort of)
I’ll give that a few days to simmer and let the lesser plants breathe their last before I do the one thing I’m so excited about I can’t see straight. Which is to drive up north sometime next week and get a
(wait for it)
(waaaaiit for it)
PICKUP TRUCKLOAD OF COMPOSTED HORSE MANURE!! YAY!!
It’s not fresh (which is very important, in case you didn’t know) and free. I hunted down a ranch owner who told me I could have all I wanted seeing as how they’re “in constant production.” I thought that was hilarious.
And since the kids go back to school this week (*sign of Cross), I’m going to take a morning and haul back enough to turn this soil into something to be proud of.
Because I’ve had it up to here with three summers in a row and more weeds than produce.
This is war.
Open. War.
I think you can use the spent coffee grounds that Starbucks (or any coffe shop) gives out for free to add Nitrogen to the soil. Hm… Starbucks or horses–t? Starbucks… or horses–t? Starbucks……. Or…. Horses–t? Yes, I was just having too much fun trying to type that dramatically. But seriously, Starbucks!
Also, very surprised to see no comments on this post before me. Come on, you baited us with poop!
I’m 12.
…wait a second. You’re telling me that coffee grounds will do all this and more?? You’re kidding. (you’re also 12).
LOL, Sue is not really happy with me now that I am going Organic. (I know it sounds like I am changing sides, but trust me I still have my Ronald Reagan tattoo.) So anyway, i used Chicken Poop fertilzer on the lawn, undetrimind poop compost in the flower gardens and i have a big bowl I now keep next to the sink were we used to use the garbage disposal, no meat products, but carrot and potatoe pealings, egg shells, coffee grounds…I think it is all so very beautiful, Sue says I have to find a better place to store that bowl of garbage, and why does it stink like poop out side?…ahhh…girls…