Peregrinus
I remember the day he and I met and the expression on his face. It’s the same expression I see more often than not and always looks like he’s got something off-the-beaten-path interesting to talk about, just the two of us, in some corner while others make superficial observations about everything else. And, trust me, he usually does. And we usually do. Talk alone in some corner, that is. And with complete disregard for other conversations.
He’s got a renaissance tack into life that has surrendered the number of times I can count on one hand when the words, “I don’t know” came out of his mouth. Which is not to say he’s a know-it-all. At all. Because he’s not. For as broad as his experiences are, for as voracious a reader he is, for as muti-talented a human he happens to be…he keeps a disproportionately vulnerable posture to the world around him. And in the best way. Meaning he seems to live in a state of perpetual discovery and openness to creation. Or evolution. Or design. Or writing. Or politically volatile topics. Or what men in their ignorance call magic. Or what he and I both bat back and both like cats playing with a mouse before getting bored (that’d be what the world deems ‘religious’) — and one of the most conversational relationships with God I’ve ever known. In that regard, he reminds me of Edith Schaeffer, the wife of the late Francis Schaeffer. She could participate in a conversation with eighty people (I’ve seen it), without breaking stride once over the course of five hours (seen that too), meandering into, through, around, and over a vast array of seemingly unrelated thoughts and ideas—until it was just she and the last person talking long into the night (one of the best conversations I’ve ever had). And following Kendall’s range of topic is not unlike Edith’s. Which means you’re better off enjoying the scenery instead of trying to place your foot in exactly the same spot on the trail.
That’s just a little bit about Kendall Ruth. Here’s a little bit more:
1. I know you journal. A lot. If you turned one year back, would you say things have changed a little or a lot? One would only hope things changed. Damn the man who fears change. We are organic, so if we aren’t changing we are dead. Are there things that seem to rear their heads that I’d rather just lop off and be done with them? Of course. One of the bigger changes is how I perceive my past, my story. More than ever I am persistently pushed to look beyond regrets or shames, drop perceived failures by the way side, shift my position in the room to see the work of art from an angle that the Artist intended.
4. What’s the nicest thing anyone ever said about you? “You saved my life”
5. Now what’s the most inaccurate thing anyone ever said about you? ”You saved my life”
8. How does God speak into you most often? Speak into, as opposed to “with” or simply “to”? Hmm…numerous different and creative ways – in a grove of Aspens with the wind blowing to clap their leaves like a thousand little hands; or like the other day standing before Clifford Still’s “PH 235″ painted at the end of World War II, seeing brilliant yellow tearing through the canvas of black tar and thick texture as if to speak of hope UNDER the darkness; in moments with my soon-to-be wife as she shares her joys, her sorrows; and most consistently in the silence of mornings over the past 28 or so years that I ‘ve been listening.
9. Ocean or mountains or desert? Mountains that roll into Oceans, with good surf. Oh wait that’s called New Zealand and my time there wasn’t long enough.
10. If you spent a few hours with any person in the world to give them advice (and they have to listen), who would it be and what would you tell them? It’d be my kid(s), if I get to have one or more. Advice? Regardless of everyone’s perceptions trust your gut/spirit and you will have a much more enjoyable, generative life than if you play it safe listening to your head all the time. That said, start discovering early and regularly what is your gut/spirit and what is not. The stuff you didn’t have words for as a child yet you couldn’t help live out of? That’s closer to Reality than anything you will learn in school, read in a book, watch on a screen. People are not out to get you. Nobody is giving much time worrying about what you are doing with your life because they are just as self-centered as you are, but you won’t “get” this until you in the winter of your years. Abundance is the default of the Universe, not scarcity. Find out where the boundary lines are, because there is enormous freedom within them. And, yet, the boundary lines are much much further out than you or anybody else are comfortable with, so you have to get out of the sandbox and explore the Playground.
And finally, the only certifiable guaranteed certainty you have is that you will be dead someday…everything else is a possibility.
11. Describe your perfect day. I’ve had quite a few, so there is such a thing as more than one. Most involve some kind of adventure (many with a surfboard and an ocean), good drink, and maybe a cigar and a view.
12. Now describe the day you proposed to your fiancee. (that is if she survived the burning room thing). It was a Saturday in May. I called her dad in the morning to ask his blessing. I am not even sure he actually gave it as he was up in a tree with a chainsaw and he seemed more nervous than I was in asking. I intended to ask her the following day, but as time went on I decided to make a go of it that evening. Skipping ahead to the actual event, I said we should go for a walk as it was a perfect spring evening in Boulder. I had in mind to ask her on a playground – sensing that I’d prefer to have that metaphor as bases for our marriage. As we walked, I was leading towards a playground I had in mind – me jingling the ring in my pocket. I turned the corner to see a giant backhoe and piles of dirt where the playground used to be. It was a rather sad sight – jungle gyms turned over, swing sets on a slant. I was crushed. I kept trying to find another playground, but we eventually walked up a path that ended appropriately enough at an overlook with a bench called “Lovers Hill” – it looks out over the whole of Boulder Valley and up to the Flatirons. I hardly even recall what I said other than asking her to be my wife. Afterwards, we walked down the street each calling our parents, swinging by a friends so she could share the news. I was starving, so we walked to Pizzeria Locale and they know us well—it was like being with family as we celebrated over a glass of wine and some of their amazing pizza.
13. Time to plug yourself: tell us about your web site, your writing, that Inkling thing up north and anything else you’d like to. Give us some links, too. Go. Image + Word. I tend to regularly move between the written and the visual, one informing the other. It’s more a summary portfolio that came about when I did a showing here in Boulder, and FoxNews Business decided to broadcast for the day from the location. My photography became part of the scene setting for various interviews. For about seven years I have written blog called The Ink. It started as a practice in writing for an audience of whom I did not know and had no control over the outcomes, a getting out the door of sorts. Though, now I contribute regularly to The Curator many of the kinds of writing I once did on the blog.
As for plugs, I am currently selling a bunch of 18×12 gallery quality prints over at my Etsy store, with $20 of every sell to going to either International Justice Mission or Blood:Water Mission. As much as it’s to help pay my bills, I am more excited to be able to help these organizations. Art by its nature is generous and generative. So I’d much rather sell a piece that also helps fight human trafficking, or HIV or provides something as simple as clean water than simply to make a buck or two.
14. e-reader or organic book? Defend your choice. So far organic is still my go-to. I am still adjusting to ipad reading, but there is a limited space that comes with a book. I make too many notes in the margins of my favorite books and though you have the option in a digital realm, it’s lacking tactile feedback. Plus, you can’t dog ear a screen. It’s a singular thing that requires full attention when it’s a physical book and I have enough shiny objects in life to….15. Anyone you’d like to hit? Anyone who takes themselves too seriously.
16. Your dog gets really sick. The vet says he needs an operation which will completely cure him but will cost $10,000. Gonna pay? What if it’s your cat? No pet is getting ten grand unless it’s a monkey that can write like Shakespeare.
17. Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity? Wasn’t that how this all started? “And the Spirit moved across the waters…” I suspect most of us could say Life feels very much like this. I mean, what person has not thought their life is a mess – an act of insanity – only to discover with time that something creative beyond their own imagination was actually taking place?
18. Barry Manilow or pour hot tar in your ears? (had to ask) Tar, unless it’s Live Manilow and you are on your fifth ga..um, er..greyhound.
19. Here it comes: the super power question. And I’m taking Flying out of your choices. Everyone picks flying. Impress me. Something along the lines of Nightcralwer’s, without the blue skin and tattoos or tail. Teleportation with invisibility in the shadows could make for all kinds of fun. Plus, you’d save a fortune on air travel.
20. Last one: if Happiness was currency, what kind of work would make you rich? Far too many people of faith lack an honest, charitable engagement with ideas or faith that they don’t understand or agree with, with the Arts, with much of anything that might feel like a threat. This dumbfounds me. And there are plenty of intelligent people of no faith that carry the same threat posture, if not condescending pretension.
Romeo and Juliet…and Chris Mundell is Rad
Several years ago I was introduced (read: traumatized) to a naked guy riding a pillow and playing giddy-up down the hallway. After I poured bleach in my eyes (read: who am I kidding—this is genius!), I acquainted myself with what I consider one of the most unique wits and original talent on the web today. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the one and only Chris Mundell…
1. How many times were you suspended in school for riding a pillow naked down the hallway playing giddy-up? And exactly where can the rest of the world find this video so they don’t think I’m making it up?
Well I never had cause to pillow ride in school, but I did first hear about it then. It was explained to me as a room-mate prank. A few years ago, when my buddy took his family on vacation for 2 weeks, some friends and I shot our first little short film (2 Weeks) at his house, as a surprise. They LOVED the video. I have a video of them watching it. That made it all worth it.
2. Lots of people think they’re funny. Lots of people aren’t. YOU’RE funny! If you could dump your 9-to-5 RIGHT. NOW. and choose between hosting your own late-night or take a shot at stand-up, which would it be?
I have been thinking about stand-up a lot lately. I’ve never done it. I think the late night show idea is more appealing since there is a bigger variety of directions.
3. Can you dance?
I’ll go out on the dance floor with my wife at the occasional wedding, but the whole time I’m thinking “PLEASE GOD NO VIDEO CAMERAS!”
4. No, I don’t mean White People Dance. I mean DANCE?
Back in the early 90′s I loved me some Hip Hop. I will admit to wearing Hammer pants, once. To answer your question: NO, I can not dance.
5. How long have you been married?
Over 12 years. Many of them wonderful!
6. How long did it take for your wife to get over the novelty of you playing giddy-up naked up and down the hallway?
She’s had to accept a great many of my, um, choices. She’s a pretty good sport.
7. Anyone you want to push in front of an oncoming bus right now?
The voice in my head that tells me no. How do you kill a voice? I will ask Bjork.
8. Weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten.
Boogers?
9. Favorite Disney-Pixar movie (extra points if it’s the same as mine) and why?
I freaking LOVE Disney-Pixar movies!! My favorite is The Incredibles. I think it’s because I identify so much with Bob Parr. I wonder if my best days are behind me, etc. Also, when Dash is finally free to use his gifts, it’s so inspiring.
10. Any alter-egos we should know about?
I have a character called Pastor The Reverend Karl (wwjd.pastorthereverendkarl.com). I need to shoot more videos!
11. Super powers or all Batman’s toys? Go.
Super powers, easy.
12. Any signature dishes you prepare to shame Rachel Ray?
I am useless in the kitchen. My wife has been kind enough to handle that. I could beat Rachel Ray at hoops though.
13. Tell me how you decided to start blogging and about ChrisMundell.com
Many years ago, my best friend, Matt Steele, was a web designer. Back then, companies had websites, but not regular people. So we thought it would be funny to make a website featuring a nobody. Our tag line: A Colossal Waste of Talent and Technology
Matt passed away a couple years ago (effing cancer) and I had to move to more of a blog layout. The whole blog/social media thing brought the “featuring a nobody” to EVERYBODY. The challenge now is to decide how to elevate what I’m doing so it’s still engaging people and making them laugh.
It’s bittersweet now. I miss Matt and yet I feel compelled to continue.
14. Favorite book when you were 12.
Television
15. We see you on Facebook. Um. A LOT. But not just you — we see your friends. So…what makes a good friend Chris Mundell-style?
Well, I’m a pop-off, a smart arse. Some of my friends are as well. The whole status/comment thing lends itself to popping off. It’s an immediate audience. I have to remind myself to focus on the blog because its easy to just goof around with the couple hundred Facebook friends.
16. Describe for me the perfect vacation.
One of those Lord of the Rings tours of New Zealand. Dressed as Boba Fett.
17. Ooh! Curve ball! Now tell us something — all jokes aside — that honestly and truly moves your heart. If it helps, act like there’s a big ol’ jug of Chianti between us and we’ve talked long into the night. Hit me.
Grace. God’s Grace for us. Our Grace for each other. There are so many reasons for us to be alone and angry. The peace of Christ is a grace to me. I’m actually close to finishing a worship music project. I know. I don’t get it either.
18. It is twenty years in the future. World Chancellor Newt Gingrich has banned the works of Shakespeare. The one remaining copy is trapped in a burning building. You can either save it or rescue a young woman trapped in an adjoining room. Which do you save?
The woman. She would write a compelling play about my heroic efforts called “Romeo & Juliet & Chris Mundell is Rad”.
19. You get to punch the worst actor in Hollywood. Who’s the unlucky hack?
Brace yourself, Miley Cyrus!
20. Name a time when you got into big trouble with your parents.
Unfortunately, my folks got in more trouble than I did. I come from a family of fairly committed Heroin addicts.
21. Not trying to embarrass you, but, do you have an embarrassing guilty pleasure? (please don’t say anything with ‘giddy-up’ in it).
I read this blog called Waltzing In Perdition. At first I went there to sign my wife and me up for dance lessons, but now I go there to show her a husband and father more nuts than me.
22. You wouldn’t be caught dead, where?
On TBN
23. Two things you consider yourself to be very good at.
Funny & Songwriting, I guess.
24. Last one: What are you passionate about?
Things like music and comedy stay at the top of my list often. I love to make people laugh and I’m getting more comfortable with more serious music side of my brain.
(Photo by: Greg Lawler)
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Jill Does Life
When you meet someone and immediately click because your humor and whacked out propensity to speak in third-person is just like theirs, you know you’ve met greatness. Or a clone. Or a cell mate in the asylum. Well, that’s my pal Jill. We met almost three years ago and have been a daily dose of hilarity and Hang In There for each other ever since. She’s a champion for a lot of reasons but one in particular we’ll get into in a little bit. For now, everyone: meet Jill Lopez.
1) Let’s get this bad boy started: I know you. You know you. But pretend no one else around these parts has any idea who you are. You want a stranger to know one thing above all others? What would it be? That I am uber hawt! Ha, just kidding! Well, that is me I guess: I love to laugh and have fun. But not just any fun, I mean roll on the ground, blow milk through your nose, need stitches fun.
2) Can’t aruge that one. Alright, how about this: you tie up and gag the Glee character of your choice AND take over their role. Which one and why? Oh for sure it would be that Rachel girl, the main one. When she gets to the climax of a song she does this thing with her voice at the end of each line. I just want to say, ‘Um…honey, take it down a notch, it’s not working for ya.’ And she gets to see the hot teacher everyday. He was way cute on the Britney/Briitany episode.
3) Now that you’ve sung your way into America’s heart, how about a little heart-to-heart with our leaders. Anything you want to tell the folks in Washington? You know when I was in college I interned at Entertainment Tonight cause I thought I wanted to be an entertainment journalist and my boss asked me what my major was. It was actually Political Science. When I told him what it was he stopped for a second and said, “You know what? Politics is just like Hollywood with ugly people.” Since then, I never really took it too serious. Its all a show, but I do think it’s pretty awesome how far we have come. I’d just like to see a Latina Woman in office next. Maybe J Lo or Rosie Perez will run next. Could you imagine?
4) Enough of the politics. Let’s lighten things up and keep it real. So you and Jesus are shopping and you come upon a pack of zombies. But they’re not your run-of-the-mill zombies. No. They’re White People Zombies. And Jill? They’re dancing. White People Dancing. You and Jesus talk it over. What do you do? Todd? Seriously? You know the last thing Jesus and I would be doing if we were hanging out would be shopping? We would so be working out at the gym
5) Very Cool. House cleaning or a trip to the dentist? Dentist hands down, I love getting my teeth cleaned…scrubbing toilets….um ya, not so much.
6) Any phobias? Ok, dont make fun of me, but I am seriously scared of birds. Well, not scared…I just dont like them close to me. My sister had a cockatoo when I was about 8 years old. I had on a pink Barry Gibb shirt and the thing flew across the room and started pecking at the shirt, at me. My sister had to run in and save me. So no, I dont like birds to come near me. In the sky great, from afar beautiful…but you wont catch me in one of those bird cages where they land on your head and all that. No thanks. Oooh, and fish! I dont want them touching me. Ill stay out here you stay in your tank or lake or whatever. Sharks, holy crap, so fun to watch on TV but, please God, don’t ever let me see one swimming next to me. Snakes, um ya….freaky! Oh and lastly motorcycles. I won’t ever go on one. My dad almost died in an accident when I was a kid so I always saw them as bad. I won’t even date a guy who has one. Other than that Im not really scared of anything…worry? Now thats another story.
Just a bundle of courage all around, arntcha lol? Shut up Todd.
7) Mountains or ocean? Ooh…I’d have to go with ocean.
8) Tell us something about you nobody knows. Ah ha! Well Todd, as it turns out, I am a singer, but I haven’t sung in a while. It’s always been a great outlet for me to sing. Ill need to get back to that.
9) Night out or a good book? Can I say a good movie?
You can say good movie.
10) Backstage pass to Aerosmith wrapped in cellophane holding a liter of Cuervo or a five gallon drum of wesson oil, a tarp, and John Mayer? Wait, am I rolling around covered with wesson oil on a tarp with John Mayer? Yes please!
(That was a no-brainer.)
11) Now that you’re going to burn in hell for eternity, let’s take a look at how you’ve lived your life and see if there’s anything here we can redeem, hm? Have you ever done something Pay It Forward or all Good Samaritan you’ve never told anyone about? Yes, when i was about 18 or 19 my friend’s younger brother got a girl pregnant. She was about 16 years old. She was not going to have it but I talked with her for hours and hours and she ended up deciding to give it up for adoption. The little girl was adopted by an amazing family in San Francisco and they still get pictures to this day. I never really told anyone about that.
Pretty much ruined that whole ‘but never told anyone about it part.’ Sorry.
12) Seriously, that is outstanding. Okay, something I really do want the WiP readers to hear about: your journey. The one you’ve started to blog about, what got you here and where you’re headed. What do you want the world to know about Jill Does Life? Oh boy, now for the serious stuff. I have struggled with a weight problem all my life. Every diet you can imagine, I’ve done it. Thousands and thousands of dollars spent, and no success. I have probably gained and lost hundreds and hundreds of pounds but just came back plus some. 2009 just hit me really hard and I fell deeper into depression. Using food as my drug of choice and wasting my life on the couch. I lacked the motivation and drive to do anything. Everyone just kind of tip toed around me and just tells me they love me the way I am. But the truth is I haven’t been living. I have just been existing. I have an amazing man in my life, a great job, wonderful friends, and family. But it all just kind of exists around me. Im tired of it. I want to participate in my life.
So all this time I have been looking for inspiration, some kind of spark. On Monday I woke up and i was dragging butt like i usually do. I like to check my Facebook and Twitter in the a.m. before work. This time was different. One of my role models, Jamie Eason, had a link to this video of a guy who had lost 120 pounds. At the end it said ‘check out my blog.’ So I did — and I spent the entire day sifting through his posts and his journey. What touched me the most was, he didn’t do any name brand diet. He didn’t really count calories or weight train. His whole drive was “I was unhappy, I started running, i lost weight, and now I am happy.”
I was just in awe. How easy this could be. No more spinning my wheels all I have to do is close the gap between happy and unhappy. And it was then that I decided, I am going to start my own blog called Jill Does Life, it ain’t gonna be pretty but its my journey and I know its gonna be amazing.
And the blog address? www.JillDoesLife.com. It’s just started yesterday but stop on by. I’ll be updating it regularly and hope I get to hear from others as I do this.
13) Love that. So what’s your biggest dream about this? You know Todd, I just want to finally be free of the sadness and the darkness. I just want to feel better. Oh and look smoking’ hot naked…ha seriously. (at least in a thong.)
14) Lol attagirl. And your biggest obstacle? I think the biggest obstacle for me is going to be keeping accountable and being honest. This is something that has always been something I have dealt with alone. I mean seriously—it’s not like I can hide that I am obese, but hey, I sure can act like i’m perfect. I think its time to quit putting on a show and put it all out there and be honest. Even though this will be my biggest obstacle it will be one of my greatest wins.
15) You’ll get there. I’ve never doubted it. Any big plans for when you Get There? Well first off, there is going to be a big party: paparazzi, red velvet rope, you know how we do it—woo woo! The other big thing is I really want to get certified as a personal trainer and pay it forward. I know when this is further along, I want to get a job somewhere in fitness and nutrition and wellness.
16) Hm. I like that. So…how ’bout this: one day in the not too distant future, you’re There…and you come across a woman Who’s Not. You’ve been where she’s at and can see into what she’s trying to live with. What do you want to say to her? The first thing I would ask her is if she was happy? 9 times out of 10 we usually are not. It’s not about the food. It’s never about the food. Its what we use the food to numb. The feelings we stuff down. Then, I would tell her that she can choose a better life and re-write the story. It’s never to late to change. And then I’d take her by the hand and we’d go find her happy.
17) Alright, time for a little Jill Time. You have a weekend all to yourself. The world is your oyster. And you have a $10,000 VISA gift card. Hit me. Oooh I know, I know: I would hire Jillian and Bob from Biggest Loser to kick our butts for 3 days straight. That should about cover the bill.
18) Okay, what’s this ‘we’ stuff? And here it comes: the superpowers question. Which one and why? I don’t remember which superhero has this one, but the power to heal wounds, broken legs, cancer…stuff like that. I’d just go through the world laying hands on people and fixing them it would be awesome! Oh ya, it was Jesus…that’s who that was.
19) *rolls eyes* lol nut. If you could change one thing about the way the world works (or doesn’t) what would you change? You know Todd, I wouldn’t change a thing. This world has taught me a lot and i’m ready to learn more. Bring it world. I got this.
Yeah. You got this :) Last one…
20) Sitting on the porch across from God. What do you want to ask Her? Oh I like this one Todd. I would just want to hold Her hand and sit in the silence for a while. And then I’d probably ask why did You give me such a big butt and small boobs?
If The Lord (or Nicholas Cage) Ran The Internet
Alright, folks…I’ve been look forward to this interview for a long time. Here’s why: when I started WiP, I designed the layout and color scheme, etc., etc., and then went in search of someone who could give it a brain. Meaning, power under the hood. Meaning, I need to be able to launch missiles from NORAD and I’m sort of not kidding. I went through about four Mindless Monkeys before I found the best of the best…and have been ruined ever since. Because I didn’t just find an expert, I found a god. Or a messiah. Or something like that (it will make sense in a minute).
Ladies and gentlemen, meet Ash Goodman…
1. Let’s get right off to a fascinating start. Where were you born?
London, England born… Virginia, USA raised.
2. Fascinating. And you live where now? (this isn’t usually a question I’d make a point of asking, folks, but get a load of this one)…
Manila, Philippines… Huh? Oh! You want the back story… ok. About umpteen years ago (I didn’t really track time when I was younger), somewhere around 21 or 22 I got this hankering to travel so I bought a one way ticket to England, worked there and in Europe for a while, got bored, took off to Asia about 13 or 14 years ago, and just kind of never left… Then after a while I met a girl (in the Philippines), got married, had kids and had to get all respectable and grown up and that’s what you see before you today. Me, as grown up as I know how to be….
3. Okay, and there’s just no way around this one (and we’re all thinking it anyway): anyone ever tell you you bear a striking resemblance to Nicholas Cage?
Short Answer: Yep. Long Answer: It’s funny you should mention that. My cousin and I used to do this thing and it went something like this… The Girl: “Has anyone ever told you that you look like…” Me (Cutting her off acting very upset and angry): [Enter favorite explicative here]!!! If one more person tells me I look like my younger brother I am going to lose it!” Girl: ”You mean Nich…” ME (cutting her off again): “Yes, yes [explicative]!!! Nicholas is my *LITTLE* brother. And I don’t look like him. He looks like me!!!” Of course after a few minutes I admitted it wasn’t true, but it made for a great ice-breaker!
4. What about a striking resemblance to Jesus? (don’t even pretend you didn’t know I’d go there). Dude! Way to rock the hair and the beard. So…a bit about your real life and work: what is it you do that lets you get away with reminding us the Grateful Dead are alive and kicking :)
It’s funny you should mention that…. just kidding! But yeah, I do get the Jesus thing as well. I work from home which means I get to pretty much look however I want, Living on tropical islands in Southeast Asia means most days it’s t-shirt, sandals and shorts. What do I do? I empower people by giving them the tools they actually need to manage their online presence effortlessly. Put another way: I build awesome websites that are as cool as my hair and a heckuva lot easier to manage.
5. Jesus pretty much loved everyone. Okay, he definitely loved everyone. But let’s be honest…you’re not Jesus. Anyone on your nerves who you’d like to send into the eternal fires of damnation? (I mean, in love of course)
Barney. I am convinced that purple dinosaur is secretly an alien with plans to take over the world. (Can’t argue with any of this.)
6. Seems like you’re having a pretty good day what with your new-found deity and all. Now that you’ve gotten eternal judgement checked off, how about a little Me Time? You get to change anything about yourself. So, what’s it going to be? Smaller thighs or a bigger brain? Go.
If this is a keeping it within the realm of possibility kind of change I would say more patience, better health. If it’s a ‘what kind of superpower would you want’? Wolverines healing factor, I mean how cool is that!
7. What was your favorite book as a teenage know-it-all?
Now that’s a tough one! I have always been a voracious reader since age 4. (Yes I am a geek, the long hair is just a disguise). When I was growing up my mother worked in a library so after school I would sit there and read everyday until she finished work. In my teens I was groovin hard on the scifi (ok, ok, I am still groovin hard on the sci fi) and was reading the Dune Series by Frank Herbert and the Well World Series by Jack Chalker. But my favorite would have to be HHGTTG. (The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the best 5 part trilogy ever written)
8. What is your favorite book now?
My favorite book for 2010: Sandman Slim by Richard Kadrey. One of the funnest and funniest reads I have had in a while.
9. Time to tell our readers what it is you REALLY do. Waltzing in Perdition does what it does with a lot of power under the hood. Power you programmed from the ground up. Here’s where you plug shamelessly. The mic is on, Ash, so let’s hear it: tell us about your job.
[Cue lights, Sound] [Cue music from 2001: A Space Odyssey] [Cue cool announcer voice]
Imagine if your website actually did what you needed it to do. Imagine what you could achieve if only there were no limitations. Now stop imagining because it’s even better than that.
[Cue confetti]
I take WordPress from where it is to where it should be. When I am done working on your site everything you have ever wished you could do with your website and a few things you didn’t even know you could wishfor are all built in. Point and click baby, its all just point and click. While other developers make pretty designs, I make beautiful websites that function as well as I believe that managing your website should not require you learn even one line of code. And I don’t think a user should have to accept limitations on what they can or can’t do with their website. So over the last 2 years I have developed a framework for WordPressthat makes it… well… effortless really. And I hope more fun and empowering as well. Its built with the user in mind. Rule 1 is always, how can I make this easier to use. Everything, and I do mean everything is built in. SEO, search robot control, ad management, fine grained navigation controls, social networking, analytics, and a slew of other awesome features to extensive to list here. Your website should be the control center for your online presence and I ensure that it is.
Put simpler: My WordPress framework is what other WordPress themes want to be when they grow up. In schoolyard language: My WordPress kicks your WordPress ___! Bold statements? Perhaps. So I’ll just say this: Todd, I think your on version 1.5 of my framework. Go ahead and tell the nice folks what it’s like.
I want to marry him.
And version 2.0 comes out next month. It’s even better, easier to use, more powerful and just plain stuffed chock full of awesomeness ;)
(And have his children.)
10. And now it’s my turn: you know how uptight I can be about my design and blog, so you know I don’t trust just anyone (stop laughing, Ash, it’s rude). But I’m feeling magnanimous today and want to share your expertise with the world. How does someone find out more.
Well they can email me direct at ash@thinkinginvain.com or visit the business website at and email me through the site. Either way I’ll arrange a no-obligation guided tour of the custom backend so they can see what they have been missing.
11. What do you love about your work in general?
It’s a philosophical thing really. I believe in the founding principles of the internet, the democratization of communication and self expression. These are fundamental rights, not privileges. It’s what computing and the internet is all about. Every day I get to help make that process easier for people. My work both empowers and frees and I think that makes me a pretty lucky guy!
12. What do you…not love…about your work in general?
Well, I hate it when I come across poorly written code, but what really, really bugs me? Internet Explorer. I mean, come on!
13. Okay you just took an elevator 50 stories up. Only you and Steve Jobs. Naturally there wasn’t much to do finding yourself in the presence of the Fourth Person of the Trinity, besides falling prostrate and burning incense. BUT—it’s you and Bill Gates on the way back down and you’ve been given Temporary Deity Status. It’s high time he had a few Upper Management Spankies, so let him have it. Go.
Internet Explorer. I mean come on! Internet Explorer adds 20% more time to a project because of its poor standards support. Code that works perfect in every other browser breaks in Internet Explorer. And if support for earlier version like version 6 are important it can add as much as 30-40% to the project timeline and limit your options. Have you ever seen that film with Adam Sandler? I think it was called Little Nickie or something, you know the one where he is the Devil’s good son. Remember what they did to a certain German with the Pineapple? Substitute Billy Gates.
14. Alight, enough of that. Omniscience gets pretty knotty. Let’s step off the elevator and get under the hood a bit. Favorite meal in the whole wide world?
Well thats a 2 part answer, cause my favorite I can’t eat anymore. Used to be Italian food. Pizza, pasta etc. But extreme gluten sensitivity put that to rest. And Twinkies, I think I miss Twinkies the most. Now my favorite is Steak (ok, to be fair, Steak has always been right up there) But its very, very hard to find good steak over here. *sigh.
15. Children? (not to eat, I mean do you have children?)
Yes I have 2, both boys, both wild and precocious as children should be. The eldest is 6 and has already been hacking his toys for over a year now. Whenever I want to know where my screwdrivers have gone I just look for him. I’ll find him taking his trains and other toys apart and reassembling them his way, swapping parts making changes etc. My youngest is nearly 2 and a half, has no fear whatsoever, no concept of limits and believes anything his brother can do so can he. Which explains why my white hair count has gone up over the last year…
16. What did you want to be when you were 12?
A Grownup. No really, I never was one of those who knew what he wanted to be, I more of the “why do I have to be any one thing” kind of guy. My big goal in life was being old enough to make my own rules. Once I got there I had pretty much achieved the *BIG* ambition and after that I figured it was just a matter of keeping yourself open to what life tosses at you. And that’s kind of been my life story really. I took chances and opportunities as they have presented themselves and have had a great time along the way.
17. What did you want to be when you got up this morning (ha ha)?
21. Getting older sucks. I do have an ambition to be a writer though. I reckon I have 2-3 books stuck inside and one of these days I hope to dislodge them and get them on paper.
18. (Sorry, can’t resist this one) Saying you kind of sort of know your way around the internet is like saying the Pope sort of knows his way around the Vatican. Let’s say you get to design the whole thing from the ground up FOR. THE. WHOLE. WORLD Ash-style. Any bright ideas?
I won’t say I have the solutions but I will say there are 3 areas I would look at.
1) Search. Search sucks. Google is great, but still a far cry from where search needs to be.
2) Spam, something has to be done about spam. And not just spam email,spamming blog comments or worse still, blogs that are spam. Fixing this would improve thing #1
3) Free Access. OK, so its not feasible yet to have free blazing fast, high speed access for everyone, but everyone should have at least free basic access to the web. Its a right, not a privilege.
19. Good book in a chair beside the ocean or throw all your stuff on the sand and get in the ocean?
If it’s a good book its no contest, I’m reading.
Ten points if you know the song your parents called Their Song. Hit me.
I have no idea, at all. My mother was fond of Mel Torme, that’s as close as I can get.
20. Speaking of songs, play any instruments?
Yes, guitar. (Don’t tell me that’s a surprise, I mean just look at my hair!) I actually used to give lessons (before I started my travels).
21. Favorite movie?
Oh wow, That’s a hard one. I am gonna cheat and give more than one. Ordinary Decent Criminals, or the Usual Suspects. (Kevin Spacey rocks!) Firefly/Serenity yes, I am a browncoat and if you don’t know what that means: shame on you! Monty Python
22. Check it out! The Hollywood talent agent sitting next to you couldn’t help notice how enthralled you were. They’re remaking the movie and he’s giving you the role of your choice. Who do you play?
OK, so I really do gotta pick just one movie then. Ok Serenity, I play Mal of course.
23. Looks like you’re having a pretty cool day, what with the temporary omniscience, the music, and the starring role in the new movie. And wouldn’t you know it? John Lennon just stepped off the Space-Time Continuum elevator (you left the door open). He’s feeling musical (that crazy John), but doesn’t have a lot of time. Time to kick back and enjoy a song. Which one are we going to hear?
If its a Beatles tune: Eleanor Rigby. If its open mic: get the Led out.
Serving The Song
I learned a long time ago (and I still believe it) that the most treasured thing you can give a person is your friends. So if this interview with my great friend, Betsy, lands in any of you something like a new friendship…well, I’ll be happy.
Betsy and I go back over twenty years. We’re both artists and, as such, get each other on a lot of levels. Music moves into, over, and through her the way other mediums move into, over and through me. That’s probably why I seek out her artistic vantage point and trust it more than others.
And can she sing? Let me put it this way…I consider the very first time our dear friend Korey introduced me to her vocals the very first time I considered my own talents flat out boring.
She is a true inspiration to me on more levels than I can describe. So—welcome back to the WiP Mic, grab your coffee and enjoy a few minutes with one of my favorites. And when you’re done, crank up the speakers and listen to Lady B give us what for.
1. List four different ways or roles by which people know you — and you can’t say ‘singer’ (too easy and we’ll get to that later).
A lover. A fighter. A do-er. A giver.
2. If you wanted people to know you as only one of those, which one and why?
A lover…..because that’s all that really matters.
3. Do you have any superstitions?
Nope.
4. Ocean or mountains?
I love them both but if i haaaad to pick it would be water all day baby!
5. You get to spend one whole day with any person past or present, living or dead. Who is it and what do you do?
My birth father. I’d introduce myself, give him a shot of tequilla to help him get over the shock, ask some questions, hopefully get some answers, and hear his side of the story.
6. Alright, a few on music. Betsy ‘the singer’ is the easy one. Does it ever bother you being identified with that?
No, not really. what bothers me is when someone doesn’t acknowledge me until I become Betsy ‘the singer’ and then all of a sudden, I’m somebody they want to talk to or work with. I know we all have a tendency to do that with each other but there’s more to all of us than one dimension.
7. Describe the perfect gig.
Last year, my daughter asked me to write her a song for her 10th birthday. She thought I had forgotten or didn’t have time to work on anything. But I did. Once the party-goers had all gone home and the house was picked up, I brought her to the piano and in the quiet of the late night, I sung to her. she cried. I cried. daddy cried. Brother fell asleep on the couch and could’ve cared less. To me, there are no perfect gigs, only perfect moments where you somehow find a way to get out of the way and serve the song.
8. Tell us about the first time YOU realized and believed you had a musical gift.
Yeah, I don’t really know. I mean, music has always felt more like an appendage than a gift. It’s always been there. It’s what helps me breathe. Early on I knew that singing and playing the piano made me feel better and eventually, I discovered, that when I did it for others, it made them feel better too.
9. Does anything about your talent scare you?
Hahhhhh! Yes. All of it. Despite the fact that I present as confident, the truth is, insecurity runs rampant among artists. Vulnerability just comes with the territory. In order to sing or write a song that means something, you have to connect with feelings and experiences that are not always easy or comfortable.
10. Would you trade singing and song writing for anything else?
Guh, you are sooooo dinner theater…..why must you always be so dramatic? (HEY! lol) Outside of saving someone’s life, no.
11. Tell us something you’ve learned about being married you never expected.
Oh geez, here you go lol.
I have had the fairy tale…anyone who knows us, knows this. Bruce and I have been married for 17 years (18 in july– this is important to anyone married because we all know that every single day in ‘this beautiful Hell’ counts). We fell in love hard and fast. What I never expected was that there might actually come a time where it wasn’t easy. sounds naiive I know, but after being so good for so long I thought, ‘we got this’! There came a point when I realized that, like everyone else in the world, we had to start working for what mattered.
I have learned two things about being married. The first is that the daily grind is where the love settles. It’s when my husband gets up with the kids or when he makes the coffee or holds my hand that I see he’s still in this. Similar to the ‘perfect gig’ question, it’s in the small moments that I see and know we’re going to make it. The second is that you don’t get to quit. you might feel like quitting, you might not like what’s happening, but you have to press on….you promised you would…..and in doing so, you reap the benefits like you would from weathering a storm, practicing the piano, seeing a project to completion. if you jump ship, chances are, you’ll drown. If you stay the course, you’ll get there. It might take awhile, but you’ll get there.
12. What about being a parent?
Good lord. I never expected to be THAT interested in the poop of another human being, to ever be THAT tired, or to ever fall THAT much in love at first sight. Having been adopted, giving birth and being a parent has certainly stirred up some things for me, but more than anything, it has helped me to reconcile my past and bring my focus clearly to the present moment. In many ways, when I gave birth to my children I gave birth to myself. It was like going from black and white to color, from analog to HD….life has become sweeter, richer, clearer, harder, easier…more. More of everything.
13. The Lottery Question: You’ve won 150 Million dollars. What do you do now?
-the happy dance.
-pray for wisdom.
-turn off the phone.
-tell my husband’s employer to ‘take this job and shove it’.
-take the fam to Glenwood and soak in the hot springs so I can just think for a flippin’ minute
-get my ‘financial-advisor-wannabe-hat’ on and do my thing (pay debts, invest, help relatives and others, etc)
-buy a farm house in South Dakota with a wrap around porch, a loft in New York, a beach house in Florida, and a casa in Mexico.
-make music (repeat)
I read a brilliant quote about this a long time ago but i can’t remember who said it….’money doesn’t change you, it just makes you more of what you already are.’ I’m guessing that’s probably true.
14. The Dinner Table Question: Big table, four guests, no holds barred. Who and why?
Easy….. Bruce. Selah. Zion. And me. Because at the end of the day, family dinner is where all that is wrong with the world is made right, and all that is right with the world is sitting in front of me. But as an aside, if it really is a big table as you say, then we can always fit extras…which we often do. So then i’d have to say, the extra spots would be filled with any number of real friends and family…who bring wine.
15. Better Dinner Table Question: Small table, one guest, no holds barred.
This might sound silly, but I think my ‘guest’ would be a great book. I don’t have nearly the time i used to for reading. I’d love to sit at a beautiful table, with amazing food, a beverage, and uninterrupted time to enjoy getting lost in a story.
16. Name one thing that genuinely makes you happy.
Lazy sundays with the fam.
17. And one thing that genuinely scares you?
Any harm coming to my children.
18. Anyone you miss right now?
I grew up with 3 older brothers (feel free to feel sorry for me anytime now) and I miss not having them in my daily life.
19. Favorite book as a child.
‘Where The Wild Things Are’ -Maurice Sendak and ‘Mike Mulligan And His Steam Shovel Marryann’ -Virginia Lee Burton
20. Something about you nobody knows. (Don’t panic. Like this: when I’m alone? 9 times out of 10, I’m singing.) Go.
But everybody knows that’s what you do. (Very funny) Sigh. Ok. I talk to myself. I mean conversationally. My husband worries, but I’ve assured him it’s what keeps me from becoming the unibomber. There, I said it, now leave me alone.
21. You get one hour with your least favorite political figure. You get to ask anything you want and you’re guaranteed straight un-spun answers. But…you never get to repeat or publicize any of it. Still interested? Who and why?
The list is too long, there is no such thing as an un-spun answer, and you and I are are finally in a ‘politically nice’ holding pattern so I’m not going to play this one. Nice try. (Hadatakeashot)
22. Something about yourself you really do like.
I like to laugh, (mostly at myself)…I think that’s a good thing.
23. And (big shock coming here) something about yourself you really wish you could change.
Sometimes I can get a little dark and twisty, I think a little too much.
24. Last question…your next CD. What can you tell us?
I have done a lot of work in the background for the last several years (singing, writing, arranging, recording), and have really enjoyed doing so, but it’s time to get back out front. I can tell you that I feel like I’m onto something, you know? Finally feel like I have something to say in a way that I feel really good about. While I’ve recorded and written a lot the past few years, it’s been almost 15 years since I’ve done my own project. I’m excited to get to the point where people can actually put these songs in their iTodd, i mean ipod, and go. (No, you were right. It’s ‘iTodd’)
If you like Amos Lee, Erykah Badu, Chrisette Michelle, Allison Krauss, Jill Scott, Joni Mitchell, Laylah Hathaway, Ledisi, or Dakota Staton, then you might like my work. if you like Bonnie Raiit, Bruce Springsteen, Mint Condition, The Who, Tuck & Patti, Koko Taylor, Raoul Midon, Nancy Wilson, or the Doobie Brothers, you might like my work. if you like Patti Labelle, Dylan, Sade, Kim Burrell, or Petite Blonde, you might like my work. My influences are vast, eclectic, and are often hidden in the shadows of what I write and sing.I’ve been asked time and time again to describe my music and my sound. I think it sounds different to each listener. I am a singer-songwriter with a soulful bent. Beyond that, I leave the labeling and marketing to others who find that kind of thing important.
All I really know for sure is that my season is not over. People are afraid of their age, afraid to speak their age in this line of work…I know the music biz loves youth so I get it, but I’ve earned every one of my years and I’m not ashamed. I might be a wife, a mother, and a woman of 43, but when I’m singing my own work or work that I’ve collaborated on, I’m just me…that’s something I think a lot of women, mothers in particular, have to work hard to find again and hold on to.
I believe my season, like spring, has just begun.
Gravesland
You know those friends you have who just walk into a room and you start laughing?
That guy right up there? He’s one of them. That’s Jeff Graves and he and I met a long time ago through a great mutual friend of ours (MaryKay WHO I’D LINK YOU TO RIGHT NOW IF. SHE. HAD. A. BLOG.)
Jeff gets it. Jeff gets me. Therefore Jeff gets IT. He’s a great speaker, an incredible teacher, and can tell you stories out of scripture leaving you convinced he knows the Author (he does). He loves Pei Wei, movies, and music. And by ‘loves music,’ what I mean is this: we play this STOOPID game that he started several years ago. It went like this: He sent me a text of an obscure line from a song. I had to, of course, name the song.
I hate this game.
Not because I never guess the songs, because I do. Lots of times, in fact.
I hate this game because I have never stumped him once. Not. Once. He’s that good. He’s so good, in fact, that once he—well. Let me just put it this way: he worked backstage at the MTV Music Awards.
Yeah. You do the math.
Anyway, meet Jeff. My buddy and the first of the Waltzing in Perdition interviews coming your way.
1. Let’s get right into the meat of things, shall we? Tell us something about yourself either nobody knows or nobody would believe (and remember, the kids are listening)…
That’s a hard one…I’m a pretty open book. It would also depend on which circle of people I’m hanging with.
Um…
I have a tattoo
I can sing
I cry when appropriate (whether emotional or sentimental)
I have Tourettes Syndrome (not the swearin’ kind…that’s just me)
How’s that?
2. If you could go back in time to witness any one event, which would it be and why?
Not to get too deep too quickly…but I’d go back to the day Martin Luther King Jr. stood on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial and delivered his “I Have A Dream” speech.
About 6 or 7 years ago I was heavily involved in a religious institution that really went overboard on it’s insistence that a godly life was one that had no grey areas (everything was black and white), choices you made were made with the express purpose of advancing the kingdom (where you eat, what you wear, who your friends are, what you talk about), and stressed that you missing any scheduled time for the gathering of the saints (Sunday a.m., Sunday p.m., Wednesday p.m…..pick 2 or 3 other days), meant you were obviously not serious about your relationship with your savior.
Where those sentences can be delivered in a number of ways, they were delivered in an accusatory tone that made you question every move you made.
Then I got ahold of a message that preached freedom. Freedom to understand that we (humans) are made from the dust of the ground. Freedom to pursue that ache in your heart that says “somethin’s just not right…I need to make a change”. Freedom to be encouraged, and be an encourager. Freedom to be able to start from where you are…not fix something supposedly broken, and then start over.
I began to hear the Gospel delivered as a “Hey! It’s ok. I get that you’re not perfect. Let’s figure you out together.” (red text on purpose) Instead of a corporate-meeting-bullet-point-presentation list of do’s and don’ts that never really answer the question on your lips and offer completely unattainable rules and regulations.
When I came to the realization that I was actually a slave to the master that lead this institution, I just had to break free.
It was then, I heard Martin Luther King Jr.’s words differently than I had ever heard them before.
“I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal.”
Gospel believer or not.
“I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, and every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight; “and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed and all flesh shall see it together.”
“And when this happens, when we allow freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual:
Free at last! Free at last!
Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”
I don’t for one minute think that my struggle was as hard or as abusive as the African-American community of the 60’s. Or that I can actually equate my master/slave relationship to that of the master/slave relationship in the cotton fields of Georgia not so long ago.
But this I do know: everyone deserves the right to find the savior on their terms. He’ll meet you right where you are. There is no condemnation. And how dare we, the community we call Christian, ever turn up our nose to someone in need.
3. Okay, now that you got the Publishable Answer out, which would it be really?
The day Elvis and Pricilla moved into Graceland.
4. Anybody you hate right now?
Nah. Overly annoyed with numerous types of Anybodies.
5. You have been given $10,000. You have 30 minutes to give it all away. What do you do?
Man, that’s hard. I’d give it to friends of mine that need it. Maybe 10 friends get 1k each. I love giving stuff to people .
6. Describe for us the perfect day for Jeff.
Probably awake from a great nights sleep (actual uninterrupted sleep)
Eat pancakes (I love pancakes)
Drink coffee (I have an affair with coffee)
Smell fresh air
Go to the beach with my wife (the quiet one…not the one with all the tourists…and she’d be happy about it)
Come home late afternoon to a flank steak, baked red potato and green salad dinner cooked by my Mom and Dad.
Hit a movie with the whole family
Watch something hilarious on tv before bed…
*clears throat
Fall asleep
7. Ginger or Maryanne?
Maryanne! Shah.
8. Martha or Mary Magdalene? (not so funny now, is it?)
Mary. She knows how to let it go and enjoy the moment.
9. You see two guys beating each other up. It’s pretty bad. Do you: A) Jump in to break it up, B) Call the police, or C) See if either sucker has an iPad they’re not watching and steal it right in front of God and everybody.
A) LOLOLOLOL
B) Hmmm
C) Um…no. See, Uncle Steve called and wants me to try out iPad v2 (the one with the camera)…so I video it and put it on YouTube with a tagline that says…“Look at this clarity!”
10. Alright, alright—enough tomfoolery! Tell our audience what it is you do. Don’t worry if it sounds boring. It is boring.
You mean work-wise? Actually it’s not boring. I do a few things. I’m the National Trainer for a company of independent reps that do book fairs in large corporations, hospitals, YMCA’s and other businesses.
I train these reps on how to run a successful book fair. Sounds weird…but conducting a book fair should really be like throwing a big party. With that, there’s computer systems to learn, display techniques to master and just plain business sense to acquire. I train them on all of that, and provide technical support to them when they hit a snag with their computers (which is often…repeat after me….Viiiiisssstttaa)
I also do creative work for this same company. Newsletters, video direction and production, create marketing materials, produce training videos and stuff like that.
Oh, and I’m a licensed and credentialed Pastor that teaches at my church. I officiate weddings. Co-lead a regional mens ministry…and….wait for it…sell swords.
All of this from the comfort of my home office in my garage under the glow of a 24 inch iMac blaring “Club Tropicana” by Wham!.
11. And a bit about your blog, Gravesland? Let’s say you have just stepped into the elevator with Ellen. You have twenty stories up until she gets off and she wants to know what you’re going off about. Chances she mentions it on her show are high. Go.
Well, Ellen, Just like my friend Todd started…it’s the idea of a blog that intrigues me more than actually executing it. (floor 2) He’s managed to stay consistent. Me? Not so much.
(floor 5) But, currently, I’m going off on the idiocy of people in airports.
(floor 9) I’m amazed at the complete lack of respect people have of others (floor 11) around them…and mostly annoyed by personalities (floor 15) that are different than mine. (floor 17).
I try (18) to find humor in it all, but mostly (19) they all just rub me the wrong way…
*Ding (20)…andIlovethewayyoudanceonyourshow!!!!!!!!!
“Please welcome my first guest…completely annoyed with anyone but himself, Pastor Jeff Graves…..”
12. You have a chance to win a roundtrip ticket anywhere in the world. But. You have to fly in First Class. There and back. With your mother-in-law. Naked. Where do you go?
First, who’s naked? Me, or my Mother-In-Law?
Me naked, big whoop…I’d take first class to London Baby!
Her naked, first class, close door, back up jet way, put jet way back, open door.
13. You get to take away one thing from every American for one hour. No one will die or anything like that. What do you take and why?
As much as a technical geek I am, I am more than willing to turn it all (phones, computers, tv’s, music) off for an hour. I know it will completely freak people out…but hey…it will all be ok.
Even in my love for all things gadgety…I get tired of them and need a break.
14. Here it comes: the super power question. Let’s hear it.
Ooooohhhh…I would fly. It just seems cool.
15. What was the last book you read.
I’m reading a few…(which I hate to do)…and have a couple on deck.
Love and War – Eldrege
Have a Little Faith – Albom
Narcissistic Leaders – Maccoby
The 4 Hour Work Week (updated and extended version) – Ferris
16. What did you want to be when you were twelve?
An entertainer/rock star/comedian.
17. After question 16, how depressed are you right now?
Not depressed at all. I did the rock star thing in the 80’s, I get to entertain when I train people. And, I get to use the same jokes over and over and over again with each new training class.
18. Name what you think is one of your best qualities. And don’t act humble with me, Graves, because I will out you so fast it’ll knock your name right out of the phonebook.
I’m brutally honest with people. Some (the woman he gave me) think it’s just rude…but I don’t. And some actually have thanked me after I’ve said “You really want to know what I think? Ok…here we go…”
And, I’m friggin funny.
19. Last one: you’re on your deathbed. It’s been a fascinating life and people all over the world are racing to your side. How many women are fighting each other because they just found out your someone else’s husband too?
“Someone else’s husband too”? None. But many women would be there to tell me how much they wished they had snagged me first, before the one that snagged me 24 years ago. And they would tell me how their lives were just not as complete as they could have been had they realized years earlier what they were missing.
LOLOL HA, I kill me!
Actually they would be running to my wifes side to sing “Free at last, free at last, thank God almighty…she’s free at last.”
(that’s called a “call back” people!)
